Top 16 Unethical Life Hacks That Will Surprise You
Well, first of all, we must ask ourselves – what is ethical? Is it something that we don’t want to do, or is it something that we want to do but know we shouldn’t? One thing, though, is for sure – it is not regulated by law, only by human morals. Now, for those of you that “want but shouldn’t”, we’re here to convince you otherwise – you should want. As long as you’re not hurting anyone, be free, do what you want. You only live life once, right? So, without further ado, let’s see some of the most amazing unethical life hacks ever!
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1. Fake COVID-19 Symptoms
Ooh, yeah, sounds bad already. But we all know why someone would fake having symptoms, right? To get off work, of course! What else? LOL! Sure, we now have the perfect excuse, and no one can argue with that, but we’ve been doing the same trick for quite some time now, haven’t we? The only difference back then is, we had to be more creative with our excuses to ditch work and enjoy the day off. Maybe little Netflix and chill, a walk in the park, or just go to the bar and get wasted. To each their own. Come on, be honest, don’t tell me the thought haven’t crossed your mind at least once? Surely you were thinking: “What’s the big deal? I’m just gonna pretend a little, no one will get hurt, and eventually, once I’ve rested enough, I’ll take the test and, well, what do you know?! I wasn’t positive after all! Gee, what a surprise! Guess it was just a common cold.” And it’s not just a great excuse for work. You can also ditch a lame party you don’t really want to attend, ignore your brand new relationship, so you don’t have to break up, miss out on all the family time “fun”, etc. Yeah, yeah, it’s unethical, it’s terrible, but, seriously, how often do you have a pandemic? Gotta use it to your advantage at least once. Who knows when you’ll get another chance. With all due respect to the real victims, of course. Go ahead, try it out and tell us how it feels.
2. Cheating In School or College
Again, we have all done it a few times. Some more than others, but we all did it nonetheless. Maybe you bought the answers from a school “dealer”, or perhaps you just wrote down the entire script on your arms and legs. Either way, you didn’t study, not even for a minute, and yet you got a good grade. So, is this unethical? Absolutely. But did you enjoy that grade just as much? Oh yeah, you did. Who doesn’t like getting rewarded without putting in any effort whatsoever? Also, the thrill of getting caught, man! The adrenalin. There is absolutely nothing like it anywhere in the world. Just don’t do it too often, though, you might overdose. And by “overdose” I mean getting expelled. Because if you get caught, then you didn’t really pull off the hack, did you? All you did is lose twice. You’re a double loser.
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3. Free WiFi
Imagine this: an old lady lives right next to your apartment. She has no clue how to put a password on her WiFi. So, naturally, you catch a bar or two of her Internet. And you think: “Meh, so what? I’m just gonna use it a little bit. Save some money from not paying my own WiFi, and she won’t even notice it. What’s the harm?” And you end up using it for a year, “saving” your money for bills? Nah, why do that when you can go out with your friends and party with that hard-earned money. Well, the lady’s hard-earned money. The same thing really, now that I think about it. We all must share – so sayeth the social networks.
4. No Santa Claus?
Wait, what? Santa is not real? OMG! Well, if you’re a parent and you really really want to save some money for that ski trip, it might slip your tongue that Santa is not real in front of your children. By “accident” of course. Sure, there will be tears, but hey, you get to go skiing. Yay! You’ve become your own Santa delivering presents to yourself. Besides, the kids are already 4, it’s about time they learned that Santa doesn’t exist. “It was all mommy and daddy, honey. Sorry. Now, since you’re so old, let’s talk about sex and drugs while we’re at it. Also, it’s probably a good time to start thinking about getting a job, contribute to the household budget. You’re not a child anymore!”
5. Free Movies
Nope, not pirates. That would be illegal, and we’re only talking about ethics here. Or is it non-ethics? Whatever. Anyway, can’t afford a Netflix account or the ticket for the Cinema? Or you can but simply don’t want to? Don’t worry. You can always use someone else’s. How does that work, you ask. Well, it’s simple, really. Simply google the name of the movie you wanna watch, and then add “google docs” at the end. It will show you Google Drives of people who stored these movies in their Google Drive. Why did they do that? That’s not your concern, because now you get to watch a new movie for free! God bless the Internet, huh?
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6. New Phone Charger
Need a new charger? Can’t afford one? Won’t afford one? Who cares – when you can get it for free anyway. Go to your local cafe and pretend that you lost your charger, that you probably forgot it there. Don’t forget to look all sad and worried. Most of them have chargers in the lost and found box, so, simply take the one you “forgot”. The one that belongs to you. Well, maybe it didn’t belong, but it does now. You know that saying – Finders keepers, right? Now go and enjoy your new free charger. Just don’t forget that you still haven’t hacked the electricity bill.
7. Pets Everywhere
You want to take your cute little furry pal to your favourite cafe or bar? But, unfortunately, they don’t allow pets inside. Worry no more. Luckily we live in a fragile new age, so all you need to do is fill out the necessary paperwork, proving that your pet is not just a pet. It’s, in fact, a service animal, something like a therapy dog or cat. And there you have it, you can now literally go anywhere you want with your fluffy pal. Even though you don’t need such services, unlike some people who actually do. But, hey, don’t forget – this is all about unethical life hacks, not ethical life hacks.
8. Free Devices
Mm, this one sounds too good to be true, doesn’t it? Well, it’s true, and some might even call it a life hack masterpiece. Hence, all you have to do is buy, for example, a new laptop, but only the one with a “no matter what” warranty. Meaning that even if you accidentally break it or spill your coffee all over it, the warranty still covers all the damages. But that’s not the end, no, no, no. Here comes the final stage. You “accidentally” break it near the end of the warranty term. And voila – you get a brand new laptop. Just make sure the damage is irreversible, otherwise, they’ll just fix it for you, and you can say goodbye to your new machine. And you need a new machine to play Minecraft, remember?
9. The King of All Hacks
Let’s say your toaster broke down. The warranty has expired, and you have no choice but to buy a new one. Or do you? Well, of course, you do. Go to the store, find the exact same brand and don’t open the box to check it. Take it home, clean up your broken toaster thoroughly, then simply place it in the box from the new one. Afterwards, return it to the store and ask for a refund. After all, they sold you a broken toaster, right? Shame on them! Needless to say, you get a brand new toaster for free. Or any other appliance for that matter. Afterwards, bow to your King and pledge allegiance to unethical life hacks.
10. The Queen of All Hacks
This one probably happened to all of us at some point, gotta admit. Although this hack never occurred to me and I always paid the price. Guess I’m just not a criminal mastermind. So, you accidentally hit a parked car. Now, a normal person would leave a note with their number on it so they can call their insurance company and settle things like adults. However, since we’re not normal, we are going to show you a better way. Are you ready? Because this is the best one yet! Okay, so, the trick is to take someone else’s business card from your car or wallet or pocket and write “sorry” on the back of the card. Then simply attach it to the windshield. Therefore, no one will know it was you and the poor guy or gal on the business card will be in a lot of trouble. Probably super confused too. However, there’s a good life lesson here as well – save at least one card that people give you so you can use it in situations like this one.
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11. How To Hit Your Boos On the Back of the Head?
Never thought of that one, did you? Yeah, well, neither have I. But you always wanted to do it, right? Yeah, me too. Unforutanelty, you’d get fired right away, or worse. However, not everything is as it seems – mwahaha! Listen carefully, before you do this, you must be sure have the… you know… two round sensitive things down there. It takes a lot of courage, strength, character, good acting, oh, and also a lot of stupidity to perform this. Are you ready? Okay. So, you glue a dead wasp to your palm and then just swing. Hit your boos on the back of the head. Then show him the dead wasp and say: “Hey, I might have just saved your life!” But you must be very convincing. He’ll either thank you and hug you, or fire you if he’s not a complete idiot. It’s that simple. It’s a 50/50 chance – your call. You must ask yourself first: “How much do I really hate my boss?”
12. Toilet Troubles
Oof doesn’t sound very nice already. And you can probably already smell it too, right? Anyway, what do you do if you clog a toilet at a party? Super embarrassing, I know. But there’s always a solution for the shifty ones. Sure, you could pretend as nothing happened, walk away, but whoever comes in next after you is going to know. And you can consider your social life dead. No, what you do is quickly find the host and ask them where the bathroom is. Then go to the toilet and run back to the host right away. Tell him that someone clogged the toilet and that you are really disgusted by it. Start shaming the host out loud, say how his bathroom is pooped and how this party is the worst one ever. Okay, you’ll ruin the host’s reputation, but at least you saved your own as*, literally. And that’s what life is all about, ladies and gentlemen. Never take the blame, instead, make your stinky poo someone else’s stinky poo!
13. Messy Roommate?
No more. If your dirty roommate refuses to clean up the place, what do you do? Well, you create a fake Tinder profile of course! Find some beautiful hot pics and swipe right on your roommate. Arrange a date and say you’ll come over. Your roommate will clean up so fast and so thoroughly that you’ll be able to eat from the floors. If he starts wondering though, where’s the girl, why isn’t she coming? Be a good friend, say something kind and comforting, something like: “She was probably just messing with you, you’re too ugly for her bro. I’m sorry.” Then enjoy your sparkling clean apartment, until next time. And next fake Tinder account.
14. Not Exactly Sure Whether This Is Funny or Just Creepy
Is there a bunch of loud children in your street? Can’t read in peace? Can’t sleep? Watch porn? Well, look no further, friend, because we got you covered. All you need to do is secretly post posters all-around your neighbourhood – a warning to all the parents that there might be a predator in that area. The parents will, without any doubt, lock their children inside. And you can finally enjoy the beautiful peace and quiet. Yeah, as we said – this is either the best hack ever or just too creepy to even mention it. But, it works nonetheless. And now you know how to win this war. You’re welcome.
15. The Perfect Liar
Little white lies are entirely normal, we use them every day. However, if you’re more ambitious than that, you must definitely read this. Here’s what you need to do. Try to tell a few lies while amongst friends, but do it poorly, so everyone laughs at you being cute. “Poor you, can’t even lie. So cute!” And now you got them right where you want them. Confess to being a terrible liar. And do this periodically, for things that don’t matter that much to you. In the meantime, your actual, dangerous lies will go undetected. Basically, hide the big ones with the small ones. So, now you can become a master liar, for whatever reason.
Oh, what’s that? You want a bonus hack? Another one? Well, all right, you naughty naughty cheaters. But just this one time. Okay, here you go, hackers.
16. No Idea How to Write a Great CV?
Relax, rarely anyone does, they’re just pretending they do. Those who actually do know, have jobs. So, how do I weasel myself out of this one? – you wonder. It’s easy, my little hackers. You post a fake job online. And make up a good one too, nice pay, but not too much so you don’t raise suspicion, flexible working hours, etc. Then, make popcorn, eat and laugh maniacally, as applications, and CVs just keep coming and coming. Best of all, they are all free. No need to pay someone to polish it for you. Go through all of them, find the best looking ones, and simply hit the copy-paste. But please don’t forget to change the name and other information.
So, on a scale from one to Harvey Weinstein, how evil are we? Nah, we’re not Harvey. We’re just a little sneaky, right? Sneaky little hackers. After all, why do things the regular way, when you can do it the lazy way? And get away with it too! It’s like an early Christmas present, wrapped up in pure victory over the ethics. Besides, ethics are subjective. Although, the father of ethics, Aristotle, would probably disagree. Well, he’s not here anymore, is he? So, my dear, lovely life hackers go explore. Try new things. They won’t bite. Maybe read a book on life hacks, hm? All those unethical shortcuts in life won’t walk themselves. Someone’s gotta do it, so, why not you? No need to thank us. Just enjoy being a little naughty. Also, be sure to watch this video on the same subject. It’s based on Reddit posts, and it’s hilarious. Well, that’s all. Happy cheating! Don’t get caught.
Main Image Source : Pixabay
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