Good leadership is often described in terms of confidence, authority and decision-making. Jeremy Doran takes a slightly different approach. For him, one of the biggest tests of leadership is whether people actually understand each other.
In this episode of Peek Inside, Doran, founder of Neuroconversant Leadership and author of the book Neuroconversant Leadership, joins Arky Jones for a wide-ranging discussion about communication, cognitive diversity, delegation, ego and the responsibility that comes with managing other people. With a background in engineering and psychology, Doran originally focused much of his work on engineers moving into management, but says he gradually realised that communication problems are far more universal.
Why Different Communication Styles Matter in Leadership
One of the central ideas in Doran’s work is simple: people do not necessarily think, process information or communicate in the same way.
That sounds obvious, but the conversation explores how easily leaders can forget it.
Arky shares an experience from a workplace exercise where participants were asked to connect feelings with different colours. While the task appeared intuitive to others, it simply did not make sense to him. Instead of the difference being treated as a legitimate variation in how someone processes information, he was made to feel as though he was being obstructive.
Doran argues that situations like this reveal a problem with communication systems rather than automatically a problem with the individual. A method may work perfectly well for most people and still exclude someone whose brain processes information differently.
He also challenges the traditional “golden rule” of treating people as you would want to be treated. An introverted employee may prefer time to think independently, while someone else may work best through group discussion. Effective leadership, he says, requires curiosity rather than assumption.
That does not mean accommodating every preference without limit. Instead, it means understanding how different people work and using more than one method of communication when necessary.
From Authority and Ego to Trust and Delegation
The discussion then turns to the power imbalance between leaders and employees.
Doran distinguishes between authority and influence. A manager can repeatedly rely on position and tell people what to do, but he argues that trust, credibility and culture create stronger long-term leadership. When an urgent situation genuinely requires a direct command, people are more likely to respond positively if authority has not been constantly used against them.
Arky raises a harder challenge: what happens when leaders become too attached to their own opinions, authority or expertise?
Doran’s response centres heavily on delegation. Managers often resist delegating because they believe they can complete the work faster or better themselves. Yet he sees delegation as one of the most effective ways to develop people and eventually free leaders to focus on higher-value work.
He offers an important shift in perspective for newly promoted managers: their “product” is no longer simply the technical work they once performed well. Their product becomes the development of their people.
The conversation also touches on cognitive diversity. Doran says teams made up of people who think differently can be particularly valuable for complex problem-solving, even though those differences can make hiring and everyday conversations less comfortable.
Rather than immediately trying to change someone’s opinion, his advice is to recognise that another person’s perspective is real to them, then become curious about how they reached it.
Self-Awareness, Control and Becoming a Better Leader
Arky brings Stoic ideas into the final part of the conversation, particularly the distinction between what a person can and cannot control.
Doran describes a similar framework through the “circle of control” and “circle of concern”. People may spend considerable energy worrying about situations they cannot influence. His view is that concentrating more effort on what can genuinely be controlled gradually strengthens a person’s ability to act effectively.
There is also a practical discussion about difficult work. Doran mentions using a Pomodoro timer and working in focused 25-minute blocks to make unpleasant or overwhelming tasks easier to begin.
Perhaps the broader theme of the episode, however, is self-awareness.
Arky reflects on learning to speak last rather than first, despite having a natural tendency to spot patterns quickly and jump into discussions. Waiting, he explains, often gives him more information and sometimes reveals that he does not need to speak at all.
That idea fits closely with Doran’s message: good leadership is not about having every answer. It is about listening, questioning assumptions, developing other people and recognising that expertise does not automatically make one person’s way the only way.
Doran’s book, Neuroconversant Leadership, grew out of several years of research, podcast conversations and his own work with leaders. He says writing the book also deepened his own understanding, because explaining something clearly often exposes gaps that are easy to miss when knowledge simply feels instinctive.
For anyone interested in leadership communication, cognitive diversity, delegation, workplace culture or managing people who think differently, the full conversation offers a thoughtful look at how better communication can change both teams and the people leading them.
Watch the full conversation on Peek Inside:
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